(She’s cute, huh? She wears pink like a BOSS!  But if she has that ink… it’s for a real good reason.  It’s personal. She’s got the fire in her! It’s in her eyes.  She’s ready to move mountains.  I feel ya girl, I feel ya)

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In a sea of pink ribbons, Go Pink ads, morning show interviews of survivor celebs, & magazine articles (I even wrote one myself in Sophisticated Woman’s October 2015 Issue, page 10-12. BTW, HUGE shout out to the ladies of the SW Mag and their outstanding work, and my buddies at MugShots and GloryBound AGAIN on their oh so cool tribute and TOTAL SURPRISE on page 9! TEARS!!!)… anyway, even in the midst of all of this excitement and beauty of all of the pink-a-locity of OCTOBER as Breast Cancer Awareness month all around me,  I find my self thrown back in a whirlwind of memories.  My head is spinning.  So many emotions come over me with each story, some I can read, some commercials I can watch in awe and pride that we are in that survivor number, and some I just turn the t.v. right off. Deep breaths.  It’s overwhelming.  Why?  It’s all about cancer awareness.  That’s a good thing, a very good thing.  No doubt.  In our home, we are very aware and can use the terminology like any other household words.  We should be used to it by now, I guess.   But there are those days that you want nothing to do with a pink ribbon, & others that you wear it with pride. But do others get it? 

Sometimes, I just hope that AWARENESS also  sets a little fire under people to get out and DO SOMETHING MORE! Even if it just means making a meal for, buying some flowers or Chemobeanie for, or giving a hug to a Cancer patient… it’s all positive.

(Stay with me. Please read… Please WATCH until the end)

As I was getting my kiddos dressed in all pink this a.m. for school and sending them with cash to make donations to MARY BIRD PERKINS CANCER CENTER of ST. TAMMANY PARISH HOSPITAL, we found this “Flashback Friday” (not a real term, I’m just coining that one.  No copyright on it.  Go ahead and steal it …or leave me hangin on my own, whatever!😉) from last year:

“Geaux PINK” month of OCTOBER 2014:

Me and my crew in OCTOBER 2014 going pink with our school for Mary Bird Perkins Cancer Center of St.Tammany Parish who was treating me then right in the middle of my big chemo rounds.

Last night I spoke with a couple about the difference between AWARENESS and DOING SOMETHING ABOUT IT as it pertains to cancer,  at a patron party for YouNight (that whole runway shindig that I talked about in my Rock the Runway post. It’s October 22nd, you can still get your general admissions tickets. Just click the above “YouNight” link before they all run out!!! Shameless plug, I know, but I don’t want anyone to miss it!!! Especially someone who’s been or is currently going through this kinda fight! … So encouraging. Sigh.).  Not everyone can make huge donations, but some can run races.  Some can do lemonade stands.  Some can donate a dollar, 5 dollars, or much more.  But when you do, please donate to places that either are actually taking care of patients or are researching how to cure more patients!!!

I was diagnosed with TRIPLE POSITIVE INVASIVE DUCTAL CARCINOMA STAGE 3 (BORDERLINE STAGE 4) if it wasn’t for the targeted chemo, Herceptin,  according to my particular levels, tumor size, and case… I would not be here today. I say that because a very dear friend of mine and mentor had the very same diagnosis (It is actually very rare for a doctor to tell you have the EXACT SAME DIAGNOSIS, levels, ph, everything… BUT OURS DID) during the beginning stages of HERCEPTIN’S usage.  She was diagnosed over 12 years ago before it was available to her and wasn’t aware of Herceptin yet.  She was dying.  She was kissing her little ones goodbye.  I distinctly remember holding my baby on my hip and praying over her with my brother in the back of church with a few of our other daily mass goers.  She was my idol, and it broke my heart to see her always twinkling eyes now so dark.  Because of one doctor that never gave up on the research for Herceptin when everyone told him it wouldn’t work, my friend’s entire case turned around and she received his drug … and she lived.

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**DR.DENNIS SLAMON, I HAVE NEVER MET YOU, BUT I THANK YOU FOR MY LIFE, MY FRIEND’S LIFE, AND THE MANY MANY MANY WOMEN YOU’VE ALREADY SAVED AND WILL CONTINUE TO SAVE

(Link below to movie starring Harry Connick, Jr. as Dr.Slamon’s Herceptin discovery after so many doors closing in his face)

“LIVING PROOF MOVIE TRAILER”

(Or Purchase DVD here: Living Proof Movie on Amazon)

Because of Dr.Slamon, and the same oncologist that got a hold of HERCEPTIN and never gave up on my dear friend, I also began my chemotherapy with HERCEPTIN from the beginning because he knew what my status was.

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My friend?  The gorgeous Angelle Albright, now the founder of the lovely ChemoBeanies. My mentor, my friend.

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That oncologist who saved her and now me, too, whom you all know by now, is at the Mary Bird Cancer Center:

Dr.Jay Saux, aka

“Captain Jack… THE PIRATE DOCTOR”

He’s never ever ever ever ever ever ….EVER given up on me or on anyone, and I know he never will.  He’s a humble warrior. He is my doctor.  He is my relentless detective (on a skateboard and in a costume!)

He is … my friend.

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The many technicians, nurses, volunteers, social workers, receptionists, staff, ….. the list goes on and on…. are ALL HUMBLE, HUMBLE,  and oh so caring warriors.  THEY NEED your love and prayers.

THEY need your support.

Any time that we can give our PRAYERS FOR SURVIVORS AND THOSE THAT CARE FOR THEM, as well as DONATIONS no matter how BIG or how SMALL,  that’s what we need to do.

If you can… you SHOULD.

WHY?  Because, if they’re still working there, that means it ain’t over.

Cancer’s still on the run.

Not everyone has a Herceptin … yet.  Researchers need funding to find another “Herceptin-like” targeted drug to combat breast cancer patients that are TRIPLE NEGATIVE.  As well as so many many other cancers. That’s what we need to be aware of.

Pay attention to where your donations go to.  How do they spend their money?  Are they going to go to do research to go save some lives and help save our friends and family members who keep sending me more and more emails through my blog and TeamBuna facebook page that I’m sooo wanting to help; yet heartbroken that they have to be in such a position to share this “club” with me.

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Nothing’s impossible.

With the team that I had this year over at MBP, I felt like I was with family… a family that would take care of me always.  My pirate doctor over there took me on board and wasn’t afraid to fight any thing that came (or continues to come our way in what I currently call “THE AFTERMATH“- More on that another day).  Helped a whole lot that the Big Guy upstairs was steerin’ the ship! 🙂

I know many patients, nurses, and staff would agree.

Click on the pic below as we humbly took part in a special IMPACT  video right here in our home for the MBP Cancer Center. You’ll see why this place is so special and why I believe MBP is one I stand strongly behind when GOING PINK!

MARY BIRD PERKINS “IMPACT” VIDEO

Click the logo above to see how you can help a patient or donate to help the Center

What more can I say?  Thank you for letting all of those pink clothes this month set a fire under us to get out there, get checked if you need to get checked, and help others in any way that YOU can or you can help the OTHERS that you know can help those who need it.

GOD BLESS YOU ALL.

This speaks to me.  I mean.. sure, we’re surrounded by tons of touching deep thoughts  and quotes on Pinterest and Facebook (which no doubt, I’ll be posting here and there in this article), but coffee first thing in the morning… without even asking for it??  That touches the depths of my soul.  Mama loves her coffee. Why?

Seriously though, the little things are what make my world go ’round.  It’s finding the extraordinary in the ordinary.  It’s just a year and a month (but who’s counting) since I was first diagnosed with “The Big C” and I’m just starting to get a taste of my “Big Come Back” to normal (or my “new normal” after so much change … and growth in my life and my whole world, really).  And all I really want to do is

THE LITTLE THINGS.

After last month’s big ol’ surgery,  I’m in awe of how much the tiniest parts of my daily life really affect my mood and make or break me (especially if I haven’t had my love affair with my cup of coffee each morning). I can feel and take on the world totally positivel and full of hope all day, but… the witching hour approaches (5 o’clock seems to be the first round with a daily dinner and dance party break before round 2 strikes at BEDTIME!  Oy!) and one by one, we can really fall apart.  We’re ALL tired, my body gives in… and BAM!  Perfect formula for a cray cray mama!

Yup. Crazy mama normally just needs a glass of vino

… and it’s totally because of this:

Thank you, Jim Gaffigan, for continuing to put so much of our family life into a comedy sketch (See: “Mr.Universe” on Netflix, OR read “Dad is Fat” for hurt your belly laughter!)

YET,

THE TRUTH IS, IT DOESN’T LAST LONG BECAUSE…

THERE’S ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS

SOMETHING TO BE THANKFUL FOR!

(may sound cliché, but it’s totally true)

Each week, since my most recent surgery, I get a “reward for good behavior”.  At least, that’s how I’ve coined it.  For example, my new freedoms and the carrot dangled before me each week thus far is listed below:

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FIRST WEEK: Get to go home after 5 days/5 nights in the hospital…

SECOND WEEK: 3 of 4 drains removed in the office; last one removed by my hubbie (that took a lot of convincing for me to go with that one.  So it turns out, he was quite the handy doc!)

THIRD WEEK: Get to switch from the snazzy thigh-to-ribs girdle from the hospital to some good compression Spanx and/or abdominal binder… (look out!  gettin’ crazy over here!)

FOURTH WEEK: no longer have to sleep sitting up .. AND… no more blood pressure cuff machine on my ankles.  FREEDOM!!!

FIFTH WEEK (currently): Get to pick up my bambino, “Snuggles” again; thus, can watch her all by myself for half of the day, like a real life grown up again!   

*Who knows, maybe next week I’ll have her on my own ALL DAY, and may even get out of any binders or compression wear.  Watch out, people!  I just may throw a party!!!!*

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Every week, every little “reward” or new freedom … seems like the biggest deal ever.  It’s a big deal to me, because it means…

MAMA’S BACK!

This week, when my doc told me that I could hold my sweet baby again, I hung up the phone, rushed through the whip and nae nae dance partaaay that was happening in my living room, and scooped her right up, tears in my eyes and all!  Ya know what she did?  Melt my heart, she hugged me so hard and repeated over and over again, “Mommy hold-a-me! Mommy hold-a-me!” She knew.  She knew this past month that we could only hold hands as we walked around.  She (and all of her siblings) knew to grab a pillow to put against me if she wanted to sit on my lap, so as to not bump or hurt me.  She knew that if I wanted to hold her, Daddy needed to do the lifting and hold her up while I wrapped my arms around her and pretended to hold her.  As I scooped her up, she looked around, and upon noticing no one else was there but the two of us… she knew Mommy’s makin’ a come back!

It felt so darn good.

With that, I began my own little list of all the “little things” that I wanted to do that I haven’t done in so long.  Some items may, to you, be recognizably monumental, and some may seem totally trivial. But to me,  it means the coast is clear.  It means that if I’m doing it, I must not have another treatment today.  If I do it, it’s because I’m the mama and I’m able to be the mama… with nothing holding me back.  It means … freedom!!!! (not rubbing it in to those of you just beginning or in the middle of your journey, but to let ya know the rewards that lie ahead!)

#DanglingTheCarrot

#iThinkiCaniThinkiCaniKnowiCaniKnowiCan

So here’s just a few on my list.  Be they little or be they big,  I’m gonna make it happen.

BUNA’S “LITTLE THINGS” TO DO LIST:

*Start going to Sidekick’s games to watch her cheer just like her mama; throw the football with The Dude; get Sunshine in the ballet shoes and tutu she’s always wanted and build that Princess castle craft she’s been holding out to do with me; swing and play more in the backyard with Firecracker and Snuggles

*Put Snuggles down for naps and bedtime again (I can do that now!)

*Clean out my Swagger-wagon (mini-van) from the wreckage that the kids have committed this past year while Mama wasn’t watchin

*Reclaim my kitchen again: clean out the cabinets, and put things back where they go! (Weird lil’ O.C.D. obsession of a woman and her kitchen)

*Cook more for the kids & with the kids like we did B.C. (Before Cancer)

*Exercise!!! (Hubbie and I met at a gym.  It’s a fave hobby.  Our sport)

*Do some house projects! (Been eyeing the funky/dirty tan paint on the walls (that we never painted since moving) while wiped out on the couch so often this year – amongst other painting projects, help with the 1/2 built clubhouse in the backyard, and  attempt some pinteresty DIY stuff I’ve pinned in the iPad while in the infusion chair)

and MOST OF ALL…

*HAVE A MAJOR CELEBRATION OF LIFE TRIP TO DISNEY!!! (The ultimate “eye on the prize” reward for never giving up that we promised the kids since the beginning of all of this mumbo jumbo.  Never knew how we’d swing such a big trip, but where there’s a will, there’s a way.  No turning back on this promise now!)

*… and many, many  more!

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The world is looking brighter and brighter with every week that I’ve recovered more, every new eyelash and eyebrow follicle that begins to grow again, every evening that I’m still awake and up and about to hang out with my Hubbie again (after a year of him watching shows next to a snoring wife), and every day that I can wake up to another morning because I’M ALIVE to see it!

God is good … all the time.

All the time …  God is good.

Infinite thanks to everyone for praying our family through.